Dating a man ten years older than you

I older men are just looking for a good time or notch on their belt. Whether that's a mature twenty-something, an immature thirty-something, or a quirky lady living with three dudes like Jess.Or a 24-year-old girl from New Jersey who happens to blog about her relationship. DON' T use childhood/pop culture references that he will never get.Or, you know, some version of whining about your age. With age (often) comes maturity and chivalry—take advantage!

But I've been watching and compiled a list of DOs and DON' Ts from Jess's experience dating the sophisticated Dermot Mulroney as Fancypants, who's a whopping twelve years older.But the guy I’m dating is focused on taking his career to the next level.He’s busy studying for a major exam that will allow him to work for whomever he wants and to make the kind of moves and money I probably won’t ever see (hey, columnists weren’t meant to be millionaires).With all that drive comes a lot of time we don’t get to share together.Early on I used to have a fit every week about what he could do to make more time for me, but at a certain point, after some compromising, you end up just trying to be supportive and patient.Besides, I wouldn’t want the finger pointed at me for having a part in keeping him from doing what he needs to do to get ahead.Some older fellas are flexible in trying new things (aka, the stuff you like), but what happens when you’re dealing with one who says, “I stopped hanging out at places like that in my 20s”?Every man is different, and sometimes change of self doesn’t come with a change in age.Don’t start changing things about yourself to mold into wifey-material, just because he knows he wants to settle down soon.It has its perks and it has its bummer moments, but I think dating up in age is something that women should do at least once in life, even if it doesn’t turn into something serious.Dating an older man can teach you a lot, especially about yourself (and what you do and don’t want in a partner), but it’s not always the easiest of relationships. Just in case you’re thinking of getting serious with a fella quite a few years older or even decades older than you, here are a few things you might want to keep in mind before you get it crackin’.

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